The Pain of Growing Up

I have 2 good friends who I hung out a lot with. What I like about them is that we can just be like kids when we are together, laughing and say stupid things. Most of all, they know me well that I never have to explain myself. It’s just so relaxing to be with them.

One of the pains about growing up is that we have to learn to behave ourselves so that we are not a topic in others’ mouth. At work place, when you are pissed, you can’t simply lose control and burst out. When the boss talks rubbish, you have to wait till he finished. To me, that’s painful.

In the family, you are expected not to challenge the elders, no matter sometimes what they said or expect from you can be quite unfair and unreasonable. You have to learn to bear with their emotion and to be patient. To me, that’s painful, especially after all these years that I have been living by myself and have been answering to my own issues.

In this grown up world we are often exposed to cruelty and disappointment caused by ugly human nature. We learned to tell ourselves that this is normal, it’s no big deal. Slowly we are immune to all these cruelties, and believe that this is just part of life. In some extreme situations, sometimes we can’t help but cry. In our heart we know that this is not right but life goes on, we need to learn from it and leave it behind. To me, that’s painful.

Walking slowly through this journey of life, I realized that my shoulder is getting heavier and heavier, bearing more and more responsibilities, and the burden from knowing too much about this world and the truth of life. Hence, the further I walk, the heavier the steps, the harder I find happiness. Most of the time, it’s just peace of mind and a moment alone that I wish for.

On an ‘above average’ day when simple happiness visited me, I felt so touched and grateful. Great moments are those that make me recalled how happy I used to be when I was a kid, shouting, laughing and crying whenever I felt like it, not to hold anything inside.

Well, being naïve is sometimes much easier than being a sensible grown up or a person with wisdom.

Viva World Cup

Both my favorite South American teams Argentina and Brazil did not go to the World Cup final. I almost cried when Argentina lost to Germany at the penalty shoot-out. Brazil did not play very well this time so I was not so disappointed. What I must say is that I really dislike France, they don’t really deserve to go to the final. There were just too many cheap thrills from France and they managed to get few important penalty kicks which helped them to go to the final. However the opponent Italy was very strong and skillful. Even though France did manage to cheat for penalty kick one more time which did win them a goal at the final game, they were eventually beaten by Italy at the penalty shoot-out.

Argentina – Rodriguez, you scored the most beautiful goal in the whole world cup. Yes!

Brazil – Ronaldo you are just too fat to turn your body, despite your crown as the top scorer on the all time Fifa World Cup scoring charts with total 15 goals.

France – Zidane I admire your midfield skill but your couch Raymond Domenech looks so gay and the team’s cheap thrills sucks!

Portugal – Christiano Ronaldo I don’t blame you for causing England Rooney to get a red card and out of the game, you are just doing your job for Portugal. Figo you look so much like a grumpy old man. Postiga, you are so cute looking…

England – I kept falling asleep watching your games, too slow, too reserve, too predictable. Shame on you Rooney, for your bad temper and poor self control.

Germany –Podolski, Ballack, Schweinsteiger, Philipp Lahm, Lehmann you guys really put in tones of hard work. Sorry Klose, even though you are the top scorer and are awarded the golden shoes, I don’t like the way you played at the semi-final, really lack of inspiration and energy.

Italy – Pirlo, Grosso, Gattuso, Camoranesi, Totti, Buffon, you guys showed great team spirit and persistency. I was touched to watch you guys played.

Too bad, I have to wait for another four years to see you all!